FOR COUPLES IN California & Nevada
Online Gottman Method couples therapy
Would you like to strengthen your emotional connection, repair past wounds, and restore intimacy and joy in your relationship?
Couples who come to me for help often feel like roommates and are disconnected emotionally and physically. They have lost the romance and intimacy they once enjoyed.
You may be feeling hurt, angry, and stuck. Maybe you have experienced a betrayal or other breach of trust. You feel constantly criticized and unappreciated, and so many discussions lead to arguments that you have stopped trying to communicate.
You may feel so much anger and resentment that you are afraid you can’t move past it.
Using the Gottman Method, I help couples learn to listen and understand one another, to heal old emotional injuries, to rekindle their friendship and romance, and have a set of skills to use throughout their life together.
I specialize in helping:
Dating couples who want to have the communication skills to move forward with a healthy and fulfilling relationship with confidence.
Married or committed couples who are struggling to manage conflict, or remain intimately connected.
Couples who have experienced a betrayal such as infidelity and need help repairing and healing the broken trust and commitment.
Families who are separated or considering divorce, and need help navigating the next best steps for themselves and their children.
Gottman Method couples therapy is a research based method with proven effectiveness to help you heal your relationship.
Did you know that the research shows the average couple waits 6 years to seek help? That is a long time to hurt!
Most couples, if not all, will at some point develop unhealthy patterns, or experience “emotional injuries” in their romantic relationship. And the experience of life challenges that cause them to become disconnected from each other and lose sight of the joy and passion that they used to feel is a part of life. But you don’t have to just accept and navigate these difficulties and changes alone - I can help!
The Gottman Method offers practical and easily learned tools to strengthen relationships and develop healthy communication patterns, gain insight into ourselves and our partners, and re-kindle the friendship and passion we long to feel again.
As a relationship therapist I function as a guide and coach who teaches skills, creates opportunity for healing, and facilitates insight and understanding.
Dr. Gottman’s research and methods are built on hard science and proven data. Using the framework of the “Sound Relationship House” the Gottman Method helps couples strengthen their relationships in three primary areas: Friendship, Conflict Management, and the creation of “Shared Meaning”. Through specific tools and teaching skills, couples are guided in strengthening intimacy, respect, and affection. They are given opportunities to heal emotional wounds, learn to communicate effectively, and focus on shared goals. Over time, couples often lose sight of the positive story and become focused on the negative. Using tailored interventions, I help couples recognize and understand the story of their relationship, and work together to rewrite a happy ending.
Couples therapy can help you:
Learn the daily habits that deepen your friendship, fondness, and admiration for one another
Notice and respond to “bids for connection” to increase the positivity in the relationship and make “deposits” in each others emotional bank accounts
Learn healthy ways to manage conflict and communicate in ways that lead to solutions and deeper understanding
Learn to repair the inevitable hurts and miscommunications that arise
Process emotional injuries and betrayals to restore your emotional and physical connection
Learn about the “Four Horsemen”: Criticism, contempt, defensiveness and stonewalling - And replace them with their healthy antidotes
Frequently asked questions about couples therapy
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In the first phase of therapy I will meet with both of you together, then schedule an individual meeting with each of you. After that, I will schedule individual meetings as needed, but the focus of our work is on the relationship, so most meetings are with you together.
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The Gottman Method is based on sound research, and a proven track record of effectiveness. If you are willing to put in the time and work, the Gottman Method will help you strengthen your relationship. But sometimes couples decide it is best to separate. I can be a support and guide as couples navigate separation, co-parenting, and finalize divorce.
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I can’t predict the course of your therapy, but can tell you most couples find by around 20 sessions they are feeling the improvement in their relationship and ready to graduate or cut back on frequency. Some issues like betrayal, addiction, or very high conflict relationships may take longer. I have some couples that work with me ongoing like a relationship coach, and enjoy the regular support and opportunity for learning how to continually strengthen their connection.