Love in The Time of Crisis

March, 2020…..Every thing feels so big, and yet also so small. Amidst the Corona Virus pandemic we are all adrift, and moored at the same time. Nothing feels certain or secure any more, except the fact that we have to stay home, stay quiet, isolate. Life has become both overwhelmingly big, and also small. There are so many worries, fears, hard things to manage and do in the midst of this. And yet the work I have been doing with my couples continues. The relationships continue, and they need support more than ever.

These couples I have worked with for the last many years and months are doing good and hard work. And I had to pause that work with them, for everyone’s safety. But now it looks like there is no immediate end to the need to stay home and quiet as possible. So I find myself reflecting on what this time should be, or could be, for the couples who have trusted me and the work we are doing together. And what it means for other couples who find themselves adrift and moored, at the same t

When I started this blog years ago I used a garden metaphor - it seems to capture so much of how I see my life and my work. As my life has gotten smaller recently, I have found the time to go out to the garden and pull the weeds that have choked the sweet peas. I spent an entire afternoon pulling dandelions - the same ones I would look at every single day and think to myself, I really need to make the time to get out and tend to my garden.

Now is the time to tend to your relationship. We should always make the time, but so much crowds out the hours we could be nurturing and growing our relationships. For some during this time of Corona Virus, they are continuing to work full time, and have also become teachers at home for their children. Others have have lost their jobs and are filling their time with gaming or binging netflix, and trying to stave off depression and debilitating fear. But now is the time.

How is your relationship growing? Are you using this time at home to nurture? To protect? To grow? Use this time wisely by checking out the Gottman Institute and signing up for their emails and blogs. And if you really want to nurture your relationship, sign up for my Marriage Insurance class for regular, intentional exercises and practice to keep your relationship growing and thriving. Even in the midst of crisis and storm, beautiful things can grow.